looking up

did my first round of blood tests
things r looking up
my good cholesterol is too low
what the …

didn’t think that was possible
but apparently it is
i am at 31 and need to get to 40
i can do that

diet and exercise
use it or lose it
who u gonna serve
now or never

many things have shifted
this last month
each decision weighed
choose and then choose again

to become ur own protective presence
not easy for us humans
tend to self

i find i like alison pill
so much more
since her top free tweet
something about her smile

i knew whoever she was thinking of
would be warmed
by the image clicked open
young and in love

i never had that kind of courage

so now tending to my body
a new mountain to climb
a place to return to
pre shame

kids r back in school
2 away – 2 still here
life feels familiar again
a rhythm i know well

the parking line for school pick up
is the best place to practice calm
as i try to decrease stress
in all ways

so many have been so kind
grabbing my hand –
“i am so happy u r ok ”
warms me

thank u
thank u
thank u

52 Responses to 'looking up'

  1. Jennifer says:

    Thinking about you & your new journey with heart disease. It is amazing how everything pauses & the whole focus of your world shifts in that moment of time. I had a massive heart attack 4 yrs. ago. I was a 37 year old mother of 2 young boys. I ignored my first heart attack & I’m lucky it didn’t kill me. I had the same feelings later in the week & I knew something wasn’t right. The doc said I would have died if I didn’t go in. Can’t imagine not being around to see them grow. Take…

  2. Bob Shinn says:

    Hi Rosie,

    Just wanted to wish you well. Hang in there and stay on your new path. It will take you where you want to be. I’ve been on a plant-based lifestyle for 10 months now and it has completely transformed my life.

    I know you can do it!

  3. debbie rodriguez says:

    Rosie, may i call you Rosie? yes i know its your name. 🙂
    I am 52. What? I am 55, just wishing i was 52 i guess. I had a heart attack a little over two years ago. Had two stents put in the vein that wraps around my heart. I started eating healthy and lost about 20 lbs then at some point i stopped and started doing the same ole same ole. I KNOW i need to eat right, lose weight, exercise etc. I don’t know why I don’t. I act like everything is ok when really i am scared everyday of another one…

    • rosie says:

      yes – i know
      a shift is needed
      i worry too
      but need to hope i can right the ship
      of me

    • Kimberly Joyce says:

      Two years ago I was almost dead. Right sided heart failure, lung issues and fluid. So much was wrong. I am going to be 49 in November and I struggle all the time trying to stay on track. I understand the fear. I fight it every day. Knowing I am not the only one who battles, makes me want to do well. Thank you for sharing. Let’s all hang in there! 🙂

  4. patricia brennan says:

    Just want to send you a great big hug. I am so grateful that you are OK. Your honest, loving energy is so much bigger than the shame and it will win out. We need the light that you are in this world…that’s all, amen.
    Forever in your corner,
    Pat & Denise

  5. I’m taking a baby aspirin every night. Trying to get back into exercising. But when I got sick, I slacked off. Getting back into it is tough. Baby steps. I get rotator cuff pain, hard to know which is heart and which is strain. I guess be safe. If it gets worse with sweating, go in and get checked.

  6. Ange says:

    Hi Rosie.. So sorry to hear about your heart and also about the Desmoid tumors. I want to share the info with you about the Dr. who works ONLY with homeopathic meds. He is brilliant. But don’t want to talk about it here. You wouldn’t have to EVER worry about your heart, cholesterol or the like anymore and can ease your stress. If you can simply suck on homeopathic specific remedies (that taste like candy) then your new title can be “Heart Attack Survivor FOREVER!;) Wishing you well! Ange

  7. Patsy says:

    So glad things are looking up- friend died yesterday of heart attack, 59, the hidden killer. Miss hearing you daily, your life lessons and funny stories. Take care

  8. Robin says:

    I love you Rosie and am so glad you’re still with us. How scared you must have been. I’m 48…I had aFib last summer and had to have my heart shocked back into rhythm and that scared the hell out of me. Anyway, I too am following the plant based foods since March. We can do this!! 😀

  9. Suzy says:

    You are really the best Rosie – thanks for all of the good you do and the positive vibes you’ve put out there for everyone. I’m really happy you are on the road to recovery and sharing it with a sweet love!

  10. giselle says:

    Lots of love to all of you!
    (Totally got cut off from my last message)

  11. giselle says:

    Hi Rosie,
    So glad to see you’re doing so well.
    A few days after reading about your heart attack I had chest pains and other symptoms and immediately chewed an aspirin and got myself to an e.r. That’s major because I’m a “just walk it off” kinda gal. Although I knew about the aspirin already I’m sure that having your situation so fresh in my mind helped me to take immediate action. I’m ok and making big changes in my self care.Vegan,yoga,love.
    I’m sending lots of good thoughts and…

  12. Andrea says:

    Rosie, so so so glad you are ok!!!!! Keep on keeping on!! You can do this!!! You’ve already beat the worst!! Sometimes you’re the fly, sometimes you’re the windshield. You’ve already been the fly. Now cut on those wipers and become the windhield!!!

  13. Academic Socialite says:

    I’m so glad you’re okay, Rosie! You’re fantastic!! I know you’ll get better & stronger each day as you do more & learn more about your health. I miss your daily tv presence, but am really looking forward to reading your blog. I had an accident about 4 weeks ago, broke my ankle, had surgery, then 8 weeks of no walking. I’ve tried to use my “forced vacation” as a time to do some self-reflection. It has given me a new appreciation for what’s truly important and I wish the same clarity for…

  14. Judy says:

    Easy way to remember – HDL – H= happy – “good cholesterol”
    LDL – L = lousy – ” bad cholesterol”

    Glad you are well – and happy. Stay both!!!

  15. Believe it or not, eggs (yes, the yolks) have the “good cholesterol.” Long ago, I used to live on eggs and my HDL were 100. My doctor said he never had a patient with such a HDL. Do Not feel bad if you eat eggs.

    I always thought only eating egg whites was a myth perpetrated by Madison Ave in order to sell “Eggbeaters” in the supermarket; especially when, decades ago, the famous heart surgeon Dr. DeBakey said on TV to eat as many eggs as you want.

    Always wishing you & yours only the…

  16. Marie L says:

    Ro I’m glad that you are focused on reinventing your eating habits and movement. I, too, am a heart attack waiting to happen. It’s hard changing old habits but I’m glad I’m friends of Janette and got on her Dream Team. It finally got me focused..one day at a time. Will be in NYC end of October if you want to go for a walk. <3

  17. Michele says:

    Pleeeeease read Brene Brown’s books on shame and shame resilience. So important in getting past body “stuff”. Life changing. Really.

  18. Deb says:

    “i can do that” is hilarious. xoxo

  19. Karen says:

    Keep up the good work. Got some good info from other posters. May check out a book or two.

    An ounce of prevention. Right?

  20. Amelia says:

    Ro, I am glad you survived your heart attack and your focus is now on thriving 🙂 good for you! I have loved loved loved all of your work. I just heard Sharon Osbourne say on America’s Got Talent that she is leaving the show. I think you would make a great third judge with Howie Mandel and Howard Stern. (and I hope it happens, and I look forward to see Jeannette in the audience for every show, seated directly behind Howard 🙂 ). Best wishes for you and Michelle, and all yoru family…

  21. Naomi says:

    I also recommend the book Wheat Belly by Dr. William Davis. You can even google some podcast interviews he has done. He’s very smart and interesting. BTW, I really miss hearing you on satellite radio!

  22. karen crowell says:

    I am glad u are ok

  23. karen crowell says:

    I am glad u are ok. I am glad u are still here stranger friend. Now blog more dammit

  24. Jane says:

    Good to know that you’re doing better. Michelle is looking very well too! Did you do the Walk in PA? If so, how did it go? Long, Long time fan, miss you on TV!

  25. SaS says:

    Well, I have no great wisdom to share, no way with words, no witty repartee. Just want to tell you I’m so glad you’re doing well and taking care of yourself. I love and admire you Rosie for all you are and all you do to make the world a better place. Thanks 🙂

  26. Sheila says:

    So glad you are taking care of yourself. Food is medicine and can heal you. Take care of your liver, especially if you are on meds. The liver is so important, from detoxification to conjugating hormones like cholesterol! Read Wheat Belly an The Gut is the Second Brain, you won’t be sorry:)

  27. I know u meant your good cholesterol is too low. HDL cholesterol is known as “good” cholesterol, because high levels of HDL seem to protect against heart attack Low levels of HDL (less than 40 mg/dL) My HDL is 83. But that is because I have Gilberts Syndrome a genetic liver deficiency and everyone with that seems to have high HDL But that is the only good thing about it But still my bad LDL is over 140 but my Triglycerides are low if u lower your Tri ur HDL will come up

    • rosie says:

      yes it is my HDL that is 31 and should b 40

      there is a lot to learn

      • And I hate Kale. The great anti oxidant veggie. Got any good recipes. So far I can stand it in tomato sauces. But the only other thing I like is crispy baked with salt. It’s so yucky cooked, chewy, I hate chewy, I hate slimy. I tried putting tons of grated cheese on it. ha ha. There goes the healthy.

      • I think you should put out a cookbook, you and Mish. I would buy it. I need help. I hate kale. I hate kale. For me its the same as mucous y flan. Yuck.

  28. Jessica says:

    Hi Rosie. You have inspired me. I read the engine 2 diet and I think I am in love with Rip! Love that guy, his book, his father, etc! I am trying also to live plant strong ,

    Who is Alison pill?

  29. sheli denoss says:

    poetry in haikudo(?)pulled me into the scene place & time.
    didn’t know you were ill as i don’t follow tv or magazines much. my dad just had triple bypass – totally out of blue. i’m a teacher so i understand the fuzziness of illness for kids. arts/crafts/writing is great way for them to express what they can’t say. i pray for your children and you.

    from me to you
    sheli denos

  30. Gloria Brown says:

    Bill Clinton’s doctor (Esselstyn) has written a great book Preventing and Repairing Heart Disease. Vegan diet- no oil. Lots of recipes. Hubby has lost 70 pounds in less than a year. Off all blood pressure meds and cholesterol meds. Looks great and feels great.
    Good luck to you in your quest for a happier, healthier you. I have always been a huge fan- still have my Rosie doll!

  31. sarah says:

    I am also one of those who is SO happy you’re on the road to health and that you’re ok. 🙂

    I would love to send you copies of my cookbooks! I am a vegan cookbook author (www.GoVegan.net) and a longtime fan of yours. Would love to send them your way.

    Let me know. 🙂

  32. Gretchen says:

    So happy you and Michelle are doing so well. Happy for you two. I follow you on twitter. Wish I had the funds to buy a picture, but cant right now. I will though its on my list of to do’s when thing pick up around here. It’s weird when the kids go back to school but nice to get into the routine of life. Love to meet you someday. Do you follow NOH8? Great cause they take photos to raise money for anti bullying. Look them up. Love to you and your new bride. Happy you are ok!

  33. judy says:

    So glad you are OK and things are looking up. I am 52, overweight, menopausal, prone to panic and fierce mom to 3 amazing adult children. Trying to get motivated to lose weight because oldest daughter is pregnant with my first grand baby, a boy named Simon, just diagnosed with spina bifida. We are ready to meet challenges. Why doesn’t this motivate me to shape up?

  34. js says:

    I think you have them mixed up too. I remember by ldl – L equals lousy and hdl – H equals healthy. Both my ldl and hdl are low but I raised my hdl and lowered ldl with the type of diet outlined in this book…
    Good luck.

  35. Glad things are looking up and that slowly but surely you are again reinventing a healthier you. Though like you I am a bit confused as to why you need to raise the bad cholesterol.